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I was given the chance to redeem myself for a recent series of mistakes but did not take it,
realizing immediately afterward that doing nothing was in itself another mistake.
It made me wonder if I’ll ever break this pattern because I’m starting to harbor some exponential doubts.
I’ll end up living in a basement apartment like a hermit and get pissed off when I’m forced to go out.

So I laid my head down
And started dreaming of you in a compassionate light
I was helping you out, you were holding me tight
I don’t want to deal with the backlash from the truths that I hid
It’s gonna be another day at the movies playing on my eyelids

I was trying to somehow cancel out all the bad karma I must’ve created over the years,
figuring it may be the best way quell the impending doom feeling I get in the morning.
Although it could’ve been attributed to drinking, smoking, apathy, catastrophe all over the world and bad nutrition,
either way I was really inspired to one day do some nice things or help somebody or try to love someone.


from Only Uphill, released November 12, 2010


tags: pop rock Chicago


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